Other Lesbians

As a lesbanim* whose social circle DOESN'T largely consist of other lesbanims, it's always a bit of a buzz to spend a night in total queerness.

We went off on a wee jolly to Brussels this week, to catch Tegan and Sara at Le Botanique. They are by far some of the best live performers I've seen in a while. The surprise of the evening though, was their supporting act Northern State. When I first walked in, I thought someone had resuscitated Salt-N-Peppa. I'll skilfully dodge the question of whether that was a source of initial excitement for me or not, but after a while, it dawned on me that they were more like a very lesbian version of the Beastie Boys. I felt distinct urges to do a pop-n-lock....

Musical goodness aside, the evening was interesting for a whole other reason entirely. My average day is spent in a relatively "straight" fashion. I don't socialise with a great many other lesbanims. For starters, my base of friends naturally grew over the years, without a definite "gender" or "sexual orientation" selection process. Basic statistics means that if you don't go looking for other lesbanims, you've a 5% chance of bumping into one. And even then there's no guarantee you're on the same level pegging. "Being-A-Lesbanim-Too" is hardly enough commonality for a friendship. I'm rambling now...

At any rate, Jo was struggling to keep my attention, the minute we walked into the Botanique. There is a very peculiar dynamic when lesbanims gather. In a very strange way, it's like a minor homecoming for part of my identity. But what struck me this evening, was the abundance of teenie-bop lesbanims. It catapulted me back to when I was 16.

There has been a definite shift in culture and lesbanim identity these last 12 years. When I was 16, the Lesbanim Icons I had available to me to identify with were the Indigo Girls, KD Lang and the creepy Lesbian DanceTeacher everyone freaked out about at school. I once managed to get hold of a gay magazine. It stated that queers wear one earring in the right earlobe to identify each other, so I got my right ear pierced. Let me tell you, it drew in squat. The first time I met "another out lesbian", was when I was 18 and signed up for Gay Camp. I kid you not. "Holebikamp" they call it here. The week's theme tune was Viva La Diva by Dana International, and that about sums up Gay Camp.


I guess what I'm trying to say is, that lesbanim teens these days thankfully have many more Icons and Examples to help define their own identity. And an identity it most definitely is. Regardless of the judgement we wish to pass upon "Lesbian Culture", we have a very distinct one. It might not be entirely recognisable to others out there yet, but it's there. And whilst I'd hate to live in an entirely lesbian society, every now and then, I like my lesbian self to come home and touch base with it.


*Despite being out of the closet for 10 years, I still struggle with the word L-E-S-B-I-A-N.