Red Dot, Green Dot

Mis-en-Scene: We're sat down for a meal at a local restaurant. Two pretty girls walk in and sit down at a table nearby. My Brother looks at them for a while, then turns to me and says:

- Allright, so you say you're good with that "gaydar" thing? Then tell me, are they gay or straight, because sometimes really, I simply can't tell.

- I'd say they're straight. Although... hm, the brunette looks a bit like a girl I'd a brief thing with a few months back so... I dunno. The blonde's defo straight. I'd say the brunette could be turned with a little effort.

- But how can you tell?!? Teach me then!!

- Wha... I don't know!! You can just tell. Little things. I don't know.

The conversation goes off on a tangent for a while, then returns to the topics of dating, flirting, different types of women and the fact that, according to my brother, weddings are an excellent place to meet new women. He goes quiet for a bit, then turns to me again and says:

- Tell you what though Sis, if YOU ever get married, what with all your friends, I'm going to be stood at the entrance door with red stickers and green stickers. And no female can get in till she's answered a few basic questions. Straight/Bi? Green Dot. Gay? Red Dot. That should settle the confusion for me and my mates.

And on another note: Had a browse through my Web Statistics this morning and noticed that the following web searches led people onto my blog recently:

- what does it mean if he snogs with eyes closed
- uninspired what to do with life
- hemarroids
- life is short

Clearly, my blog should be awarded government funding for its services as a therapeutic agent ;-)